Do You Really Want It? (Growth + Money Mindset 101)
Aug 07, 2023Season 5Episode 8
Nandi Camille
Ever wonder what's holding you back from achieving your deepest goals and desires? This episode peels back the layers of self-limiting beliefs, and I, your host, will guide you on a transformative journey towards self-empowerment. Using the power of language and thought, we delve into a deeper understanding of how our mindsets shape our realities. We explore the significance of being mindful about our words and how changing our language can create a shift in our feelings and thoughts. With an inspiring story of a friend who overcame adversity through self-belief, we seek to show you that by believing in yourself, you can create the life you want.
Imagine if life was a game of Battleship, filled with moments of uncertainty, wouldn't you want to learn how to navigate it to your advantage? We look at how you can use these moments to ignite your creativity and shape your own life story. I discuss the importance of conscious decision-making and the integral role of support in our life journeys. Lastly, I introduce my personalized coaching services designed to provide the extra boost you need to seize control of your destiny. Remember, you are the main character in your life story and you are wired to win. So why not tune in and discover your potential?
ENJOY THE PODCAST? Leave us a 5-star review so more people can find us!
Ever wonder what's holding you back from achieving your deepest goals and desires? This episode peels back the layers of self-limiting beliefs, and I, your host, will guide you on a transformative journey towards self-empowerment. Using the power of language and thought, we delve into a deeper understanding of how our mindsets shape our realities. We explore the significance of being mindful about our words and how changing our language can create a shift in our feelings and thoughts. With an inspiring story of a friend who overcame adversity through self-belief, we seek to show you that by believing in yourself, you can create the life you want.
Imagine if life was a game of Battleship, filled with moments of uncertainty, wouldn't you want to learn how to navigate it to your advantage? We look at how you can use these moments to ignite your creativity and shape your own life story. I discuss the importance of conscious decision-making and the integral role of support in our life journeys. Lastly, I introduce my personalized coaching services designed to provide the extra boost you need to seize control of your destiny. Remember, you are the main character in your life story and you are wired to win. So why not tune in and discover your potential?
ENJOY THE PODCAST? Leave us a 5-star review so more people can find us!
Hi, friends, and welcome to Believe Like a Boss. I'm your host Life Coach, nandi Kamil. Join me as I teach you how to smash your goals and expand the possibility of your life through mindset management, spiritual alignment and authentic action. I'll teach you how to create what I like to call a life of thrive, with ease and authenticity. It's time to play with what's possible. Are you ready? Let's go.
Speaker 2:
Hello, hello, hello, my friends, and welcome back to another episode of Believe Like a Boss. I am your host, life Coach, nandi Kamil, and I am recording on the fly. So if you're hearing echo and it sounds a little bit different than the normal recording, I am recording on my phone and I am in a little bit of an echo-y space, so I apologize for that. But thank God for Buzzsprout Magic Mastering, because they do a fabulous job, even when I am recording in echo-y spaces, of helping the audio. On this I am not being sponsored by Buzzsprout, I just really appreciate the company and if you want to create a podcast, I highly recommend them.
Speaker 2:
So this week, my friends, the reason why I'm hopping on, the reason why we're doing this off of my phone, is because I was having a thought. I was listening to a voice memo from I'm going to keep this person's identity closed, it's actually not a client, it's just a friend of mine and they were saying how they wanted to be more of a morning person and they wanted to get up and I had voice memoed them when I was walking this morning I did a walk from 7.30 to about. Well, I got in my car about 7.30. It was about a 40 minute walk and they noticed they're in a different time zone than me. They're like, oh my gosh, you're up early and going on a walk. I wish I could do that and I just had this moment because the work I'm not coaching my friend, obviously, but it just brought me back to my clients. And why I do what I do is because women people are but the women that I work with are sick of saying I want to get up and walk, I want to go to the gym, I want to start the business, I want to be financially free, I want to fall in love with the person that's going to make me feel so good, not because I don't feel good already. We work on that too. I feel good about myself and I'm attracting somebody that feels good about me and feels good about themselves and we're going to build this beautiful life together. When we're working towards those things, we say I want all of these things.
Speaker 2:
What happens is, as this friend was telling me in their voice memo, they're like I just can't get up. I just can't get up in the morning and walk. I just can't do it. And I had the thought where I was like, yes, you can, because what she was saying she's saying I want to. I'm so glad that you got up early and you did that, like that's so cool that you did that. I want to do that, but I can't. And so immediately my coach, your brain, hears the duplicity I want to, but I can't. I need you to please.
Speaker 2:
This is why we practice mindfulness, awareness without judgment. Be very careful about what you're saying and be very careful and I say that with love, because having I have a very anxious brain, naturally or not naturally, as a result of the childhood that I grew up in, and can get a little bit crazy about, oh my gosh, I have to make sure I'm saying everything right. I had to make sure I'm thinking all the right thoughts. That's not what I'm saying. I want you to be mindful. I want you to be mindful about what comes out of your mouth after you say something that you want. I want to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. I want to travel to the Maldives. I want to build a house in a mountain countryside, in a beautiful space, and raise my kiddos on the land. What is the next thing that comes up after that? But I can't. But I don't know where to start, but I am too old to do that, but nobody in my family has done that.
Speaker 2:
Notice the thing that you say next, because this is what is getting in your way, not anybody else. The fact that you don't believe that you can do it. That's the first thing is. I heard that duplicity. The second thing that came up for me was you don't want it, not to this friend, but just in general.
Speaker 2:
When I'm thinking about okay, what happens to my clients who are, say, they come to me and like I want to get to the next level of my business, which means I am making $30,000 a month. This is a conversation that I had with a client recently. I want to have 30K months, right. And so we're like, okay, great, fabulous, you want to have 30K months, but do you actually? What does that mean? Right, what does it mean to have 30K months? What does that mean in your thought process, what does that mean? And how you show up? What does that mean? And the resources that you're using, right? Let's think, financially free. I think that this is an example that a lot of people can relate to.
Speaker 2:
I want to be financially free. I want to be able to say yes to things I want to say yes to. I want to be able to say no to things I don't want to. I want to be able to say no to things, but not because of money. Right? I want to say yes to whatever. I want to say yes. You want to say no to things that are just not in alignment for me, not because I can't afford them. Right? I want to say that you have to think about the person that you need to be. That is different than how you're being now. That is in alignment with being financially free.
Speaker 2:
That means looking at your finances. Do you know how much is in your bank account? Do you know how much you're spending? Do you know how much you're making? Do you know how much you need to be making in order to have the lifestyle that you want? Do you know how much it's going to cost to pay for massages every single month for you and your spouse? Do you know how much it's going to cost to send your kids to that one school that you're dreaming of sending them to start there? Right, in order to be?
Speaker 2:
You can't say you can. You can do whatever you want, but it doesn't serve us to say I want to be financially free, but then you're not doing anything that is in alignment with a person that is financially free. Are you organized in your budget? And if you, we have options here, right? If you're like I hate looking at numbers, well, that might just be where you need to start. We have some options there too.
Speaker 2:
Okay, are you going to become a person that's more comfortable with looking at numbers, competent and confident around numbers? Are you going to get over that part of yourself so you can become that better version of you? I would offer that's the right way we're going to go. Do the work to become the person that is confident with numbers. The other option here is that you don't have to be right. There's other schools of thought that are like if something is hard and difficult for you, don't do it. Hire somebody to do it. Now, all of us are in the position to be able to. I don't want to look at my finances, so I'm going to hire a financial advisor or accountant to manage it for me, right? So if you're not in a place where somebody can manage it for you, you need to put your big girl pants on. You need to put your crown on my love and get comfortable with being uncomfortable, because that is how we become the next version of ourselves.
Speaker 2:
Notice is what I'm going to come back to. Notice what comes out of your mouth, or not even out of your mouth, when you're thinking about your dreams. What are the subsequent thoughts? Are they? Of course I'm going to, of course this is going to happen. I don't know how to yet, but I'm going to figure it out. Maybe I'll reach out to that one friend I can't wait until.
Speaker 2:
Is it in that energy, or is it in all? I never could. I don't really know where to start. I don't have any money to start a business anyway. Businesses cost a lot of money to start, so I don't have money to make money, so I'm never going to have money.
Speaker 2:
Notice the tone, the flavor, the energy of your thoughts. Is it in alignment with the person who has what you want, that future version, you that has what you want, or is it in alignment with lack, with scarcity, with victim mentality? You're like but Nadia, have so much evidence, I have so much evidence for everything going wrong. I got a flat tire and I got let go from my job and my boyfriend broke up with me and my grades are slipping Y'all. I'm telling the story of me in college, right? I could have used all of that evidence against me my grades slipping, my boyfriend leaving me. I was miserable and I could have allowed those things to determine the next parts of my life, my future. But I said no, these things happened and I'm going to still be successful. I'm going to take what I've learned from this and use it. I am capable. It doesn't matter that these crappy things have happened to me. That doesn't mean that I'm a bad person.
Speaker 2:
Notice what you're making things mean. It doesn't mean that I'm a bad person. It doesn't mean that I'm wrong or stupid. Notice what you're making things mean. That's not only the thought that comes after the desire I'm making me wanting a million dollars. What are you making it mean? I'm going to have to do really hard work and never be around my family and hustle myself into the ground, right, and so then you have this dream to be a millionaire, but at the same time, duplicity.
Speaker 2:
You're like but I could never, it will take too long, I will have to work too hard, and it's just not worth it, even though something in you wants to do it. Something in you wants to be a supermodel. Something in you wants to be a mom. Something in you wants to go on that vacation. And then something else in you you keep listening to it. It's telling you no, it's not possible. I want you to check in and if that's you, we're not going to beat yourself up.
Speaker 2:
Oh my gosh, I've been living in uncertainty and a lack of mindset. Think of all the things I could have created by now. I've done that. I've had that conversation with myself. I've had that conversation with clients, where we have these aha moments. We're like, oh my gosh, things are possible for me, things can get better for me. And then the brain wants to be mean to us and like, if only you would figure this out sooner. You could have been so much further. Look at that girl, 20 something years old, doing that. Don't do that. Don't do that. It doesn't serve you. It's not making you feel better. It's not giving you creative ideas to make that multimillion dollar company. It's not making you, giving you the resources to be the compare that you want to be. It is making you cranky. It is making you upset. It is leaving you in scarcity and lack mentality. That is not serving you.
Speaker 2:
Check in. What do you want? What do you desire? What would be really cool to have, or experience or be, and what are your thoughts about that? What are the stories you're telling about that? Do you believe that it's possible? Let go of the how your job is, not the how your job is to know that it's possible and to continue to show up as if it's already done? You want to be financially free. What does that mean? For me, it also means being financially confident, knowing what's going on with my money, understanding how to build multiple streams of income, understanding the multiple facets of money. I'm still learning right, but because I have these big goals that are financial goals, I'm showing them as if it's already done. Okay, the person, the version of me who already has this much in the bank this is what I think she's doing right, and as you take those steps, you get more information. You might trip and fall, you might make a misstep, but you are always getting closer to your goal.
Speaker 2:
I was playing a battleship with Tyler. It's one of the things we love to do. I was playing battleship with Tyler and this metaphor came to me this morning where, if you've never played battleship, I didn't play battleship until I was an adult and I was running as the director of a before and after school program in summer camps and the kids taught me how to play battleship and I absolutely love battleship. Now and now we play it on our phones and what it is is that you are, you put on your side your ships, you arrange them and your opponent on their side. You cannot see their side, they cannot see your side arranges their ships on their side, because you cannot see their ships and and they cannot see yours. What you're trying to do is sink all of their ships.
Speaker 2:
It works in a grid, so you may say a two, right, you imagine a grid and they'll tell you hit or miss. You hit my ship or you missed my ship. Now we're playing on our phones, so that's, I either hit it or I don't. I see this like on my screen ocean, and it's just blank, and I hit the blank spots think mine sweeper, but ocean essentially, and you're wanting to hit the ships, right. So all that, sorry if you've already played battleship, how to explain to the people who haven't? But I'm playing with him and on my side I can see all the spots that Tyler is hit, but are not my ships and this morning I'm looking at my phone and he is for two of my ships hit every single spot around the ship except for the ship.
Speaker 2:
And it made me laugh because it's like, wow, what a beautiful metaphor for life that sometimes we're going after things and we're like throwing out our, our bombs. We'll say, our ideas right, we're throwing out our ideas, we're throwing out, you know, our. We're showing up on instagram, we're posting on youtube and we're going out to the events and we're doing the networking and we're on the dating app and we're going to the gym or we're doing the things, and we just don't feel like we're getting the results that we want. Right, we just feel like we're landing in the water. Miss, I'm landing in the water, I'm not hitting the thing that I want to hit, I'm not getting the result that I want to get. But the thing is, that made me chuckle was that Tyler knows he's going to hit my ship and I know he's going to hit my ship because that's how the game works. At the end of the game, I will have hit all of his ships, or he will have hit all of my ships and there might be one or two from the opponent, opponent that is missing, right, but we, we know he's going to hit my ship, right. And so when we can we think about life that way? Right that, even if you've been not getting the result that you want, you've been trying and you've been trying and not getting the result that you want, right? First, puzzle piece mentality be willing to try it a different way, right. So you're trying using puzzle piece mentality, you're trying it different ways, like, but you're showing up and you're being consistent. Can you, like the game about your ship? Know you're going to hit the ship, because that's just how the game works. I'm going to hit the ship, that's how the game works. I just have to keep going right. If Tyler quit the game because he was upset that he wasn't hitting my ships, he's never going to hit any of them, right, but he's one step closer now. Now both my ships are surrounded, he's probably going to hit it on the next one, right. And so I want you, I want to offer that to you, I want you to think about life as a game. I'm going to win this game. That's the way it's wired. We are all main characters in our own lives. We are all wired to be the winners of this game.
Speaker 2:
Just like the movies that we watch, right, the good movies, I like to say the ones you know and well, right, where you just know that, no matter what the hero is going through, it will be okay. Can you think about your life that way that, even though you've been through all this stuff, it's part of the movie of your life. It is a part of the movie if you went to the movies my friend and I were talking about this the other day it's the hallmark movie versus the other movies. There's nothing wrong with a hallmark movie. Sometimes you just want to sit and you want to veg and you know what's going to happen and you know what to expect and it's just easy, right, that's. There's nothing wrong with that.
Speaker 2:
But there's something delicious about that movie where, like, the character is going through some stuff and you know that character is going to get through it. You know they are. You don't know how. We don't know how. When we're watching a movie, we have no idea how the character is going to get to the end of it, but we know that it's going to be okay. You know that it's going to be solved.
Speaker 2:
I've been watching star trek with Tyler Lely, and every episode is like that oh my gosh are is. Are they going to survive? Are they going to be okay, except for everything, and be okay and I know that every single episode it will be okay, but there is a period where we question ourselves. We have to use our minds to come up with new ideas. We are forced to be creative. Those are the sticky parts, those are the opportunities.
Speaker 2:
Are you using those sticky moments in your life as opportunities, or are you telling yourself the story of look, here's another reason why I'm not getting what I want. Please stop that. Please stop that. What you focus on expands where your focus goes. Your energy flows. What stories are you telling yourself, and are they in alignment with the goals, with the dreams, with the desires that you have and that you are entitled to receive? They were placed on your heart. They are possible in the world.
Speaker 2:
As always, my friends, take what sticks to you, leave the rest. If it doesn't resonate, don't worry about it. I hope that this serves you, though. Have a beautiful rest of your week. I'll see you next time. Hey, friend, if you like this podcast, I would love it if you give us a five star rating. Share it with your friends. Share it with somebody another girl boss babe that you know is grinding, showing up as her best self and can maybe use some support on her way. If you're interested in one-on-one coaching, if this podcast resonates with you and you're ready for some one-on-one support support for you and your journey go ahead to nandekamealcom to learn more, or head over to nandekamealasme to sign up for your free discovery call. I'll see you soon, queen.